Late Night Monologue – Week of 6/27/11

The big news is still same-sex marriages. New York’s bill allowing gay and lesbian couples to marry will go into effect July 24. This, of course, means that all eyes will be on the marriage ceremonies for high-profile, celebrity couples – particularly Bert and Ernie’s long-rumoured Today Show wedding. 

– Prince William and Catherine, the newlywed royal couple, visited Canada last week, making it their very first official trip abroad. When asked why they chose Canada, they replied, “What couple hasn’t dreamt of that romantic getaway to Saskatchewan?”  

On Friday night, the Minnesota government shut down because state lawmakers failed to reach a budget agreement. Yes, when asked to comment, former Minnesota governor and current GOP presidential contender Tim Pawlenty attentively listened to Mitt Romney’s response.

Speaking of the 2012 race, Tom Petty recently demanded that Michele Bachmann stop using “American Girl” for her campaign. Oddly enough, in 2004 he had no problem with John Kerry using “Zombie Zoo” for his.

And finally, director Michael Bay has sent a letter to movie theater projectionists across the nation with specific instructions on how to present the latest Transformers movie, ending the letter by saying, “Let’s make the audiences believe again.” These audiences are then treated to a two-hour feature where Shia LaBeouf plays an action hero whose love interest is a Victoria’s Secret model. 

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